Bringing Sexy Back: My experience as a Burlesque Dancer…

Last week I was invited to a dance class. I was slightly hesitant at first because I am about as dainty as an Alaskan Moose, but this wasn’t any old dance class, this was a Burlesque inspired dance class. I have never really considered Burlesque before, so naturally I was curious to see what it was all about. I soon discovered that there were no ‘Good Toes, Naughty Toes’ here, as the hip thrusts and seductive teeth-tearing-off-gloves moves were straight out naughty. Although, unfortunately for my inner Beyonce, I also found out that I am just about as sexy as a bean sprout, and as supple as a spanner.

The classes are run by lovely Mia (AKA Scarletta Fire), founder of Firetta Burlesque with classes held in Tunbridge Wells, Crowborough and Tonbridge. We started the class with some traditional Burlesque walks, including ‘Wiggle Walks’, ‘Bump walks’ (or as I prefer to call- dislocated hip walks), and The ‘Step and Drag’ (my favourite). We were then given a quick recap of the previous lesson so that we could continue learning the moves to our dance routine. It takes 4 sessions to learn a whole routine, and suitable tracks are selected from a diverse range of music. Our song for the week was The Black Keys- Howling’ For You:


There were 4 of us in the class and we were each given various ‘solo’ moves throughout the routine (Person 1- hold your arm up, Person 2- pose with your arms to the side etc), we were also given long silk gloves which we had to slowly take off with our teeth. Those who know me, know that I am quite a prude, and I end up blushing like a school girl at the mention of anything ‘risqué’ but by the end of the hour, I was strutting up and down that hall with so much sass that I was considering where I could purchase a feather boa and a giant champagne glass that I could sit in once home.


6c99e4660d054fd8c25f428e21e4386dFrom initially feeling self conscious I left the class feeling more confident, my joints felt better for it (I still carry Molly on one hip a lot, so by practising the ‘moving your hips in the figure 8’, I felt like I had been ‘re-aligned’) but most of all- I had fun! It was something different, AND it was exercise (which really didn’t feel like it). I was so surprised the following day when my whole body ached too.

I had never heard of these kind of classes before, and I would definitely recommend them. It would be a great idea for a party – whether that be a birthday party, a hen party, heck why not any kind of party! I’m sure the ‘Wiggle Walk’ stories from Grandmas Retirement will be fantastic dinner table talk for years to come.

Whether it is something you want to try with friends, or something you would prefer to try on your own, get your wiggle down to Firetta Burlesque for an hour of fun that you certainly won’t forget.

For more information on classes and times, please visit: